Oprah Wannabe

Thursday, 11 December 2008


My answer… it did slightly, but I’m working on it after having been given a kick up the arse.

You see, working from home comes with many plus points. Not having to commute into the office is bloody fantastic as it means not having to smell a city man’s foul armpit. It also means you don’t have to watch chicks turning into a completely different person whilst they transform their ‘face’ before reaching the office. It means no need to be fighting through the wind and rain to get to work every day and it also means you no longer have to look at the junior members of your team, telling them telepathically that its fine for you to be late as you have a valid reason, but it isn’t fine for them to be late due to a hangover or the fact they had next to no sleep, after picking up ‘some fit guy’ which resulted in them staying at his house or checking into a hotel. Now let’s list the negatives… it means not being able to have your daily dose of Martin and Lucy on Choice FM coming through your phone, it means not being able to pick up the essential morning read of the Metro Newspaper. Lastly, but more importantly, it means missing out on the walk from home to the train station, walking between stations to change lines and doing the 10 minute walk from the train station to the office, then doing it all over again in the evening. What’s negative about the last reason I hear you ask? Let me tell you… this was the only bit of regular exercise my body received.

I tried the whole gym thing whilst working for my previous employer, (I actually worked in a gym for a year an a half back in the day), but as the pressures of PR got more intense, the last thing I wanted to do after leaving the office between the hours of 7- 11pm was go and do a work out. I decide to make some time to exercise and signed up for a weekly swimming class which I loved, but since giving birth to boss lady I haven’t returned, however this is all about to change… I promise you.

Rewind to 1 hour ago... I just came back from an appointment with my nurse, just to do a routine check… the usual stuff. During which she ask me to jump on the scales as she wanted to record my weight. I stepped on and she did her checks then told me it was fine for me to step down. She then said I was around 6 pounds or so… I asked her to convert this into stones and after fiddling with her scale converter, she said “you’re 11 stone”. A bit shaken by the ’11 stone comment’, I then said, “is my weight ok for my height” whilst putting my UGGs back on my feet and picking up my blackberry as I was attempting to keep myself busy so I could ‘just about hear’ what she about to say if it was good news and block it out if it was bad news, does that makes sense? “Actually, I was about to tell you that you’re over weight and you need to go on a diet” she replied so matter – of fact -ly. She continued to say “I would say you should look to lose around 1 ½ stones”… I don’t think my head has ever shot up so fast.

In my shock and vex-ness I called my friend FS as I needed to vent, there was no way I was calling my boyfriend. The first thing he would do would laugh and sing “who ate all the pies”, in his wack cockney voice. “I’m officially fat” I told her to which she started to laugh. I explained I had been with the nurse and what she had said to which she replied “Ronks, what you chubby now? I thought you were losing weight”. If my hand could go through the phone and give her one slap across her face her head would be rolling side to side about now. After I finished venting and she finished taking the mick, she ended the phone call with “see you tomorrow fatty”.

Luckily for me earlier this week I enrolled for a Yoga and Dance class as well as re enrolling for my weekly swimming class at the local leisure centre. Cha’ it’s as if God knew what was coming… I’ll be damn if I turn into a self employed, mother of one, who has lost her way from the path of looking good to looking mash up. I’ve already been indirectly dissed re my daily attire of head scarf, tracksuit bottoms and vest top by my boyfriend, (this is another post for another time, PART 2 of this post actually) – and I know the first day his Mum saw what I wore during the day whilst working at home, left her to stare at me longer than she had to. She had only come down into the office to say “morning” after all, why was she staring at me (in silence), 10 seconds after?

Anyway, today’s events have confirmed I need to get serious… I’m supposed to be ‘getting hot for 09’ – if I continue as I am, I’ll be far from ‘hot’ and more like ‘not’ on January 1st 2009.

Wednesday, 3 December 2008


So, I’ve been trying to make contact with my web designer for the last two months now. I’ve left numerous voice messages, texts and emails and yet, nothing. No calls returned, no email… nada.

So when I called earlier this morning and his colleague answered, I said politely, ‘Hi can I speak to XXXXX please’, to which she replied ‘yes, who’s calling’. I politely gave my name and she then lowered the mouth piece which allowed me to hear her tell him who was on the phone. Seconds later, she returns to my call and says ‘Err, XXXXX is just taking the rubbish out, he said he will call you back’.

‘Taking the rubbish out?’ Are you for real? If taking your rubbish out is far more important than taking a call from a paying client who has been chasing you for the past eight weeks, then there is no hope. So yes, I think its about time I resign my business from them as well as forget about sending any business their way. Obviously the ‘credit crunch’ isn’t affecting them in anyway whatsoever.